Smokin’ Hot

This couple came into the store and the female goes into try on clothes and the male drapes himself over the chair in my line of vision. I greeted them both and talked up the guy about the weather. He was dressed like a tough nut. She was tall and could have passed for a model in a photo-shopped mag. The conversation showed only one aspect to this man and he didn’t seem to understand weather or growing things. I always find that surprising yet disturbing. It was only 10am and he said he had taken a break from working in this hot weather to go shopping with his partner. I was wondering what hot weather he was referring to and how he was taking a break for shopping at 10a. He said that I probably had not experienced this super heat at my particular job that day. I agreed with him and noted silently that he was delusional although chatty.

I had my back turned to him to attend to some other part of my job when his partner came out of the fitting room and he said, “HEY!” Then again, “HEY, LADY!” I swung around as he commanded. “Tell her how smokin’ hot she will look when her belly is huge from being pregnant!” To her,” Is that zipper supposed to be in the front or the back? Heh, heh, heh, doesn’t matter.”

I looked over his offering and took in the look in her eyes. She looked vulnerable. She was wearing some skin tight striped body suit cropped leg whole piece thing. Then I noticed a baby bump that would have eluded me on her if I wasn’t asked to comment. For me this would not be a go to garment, but most likely she would look good even in a paper bag. He then commanded, “Tell her how smokin’ hot she will be with a big belly.” The thing is that he was trying to be encouraging and loving even though he sounded like a moron.

I told her that she was lovely now and would continue to be beautiful as she was growing a person, which was important work. She looked a bit relieved, as someone who was used to being model-like must feel when they have received news that they are not going to go south immediately…of course I am just considering what she is thinking this because I have no idea. I spared her from the unwarranted comments that flooded my brain like, stretch marks, saggy boobs, tired face…. She says, “I think I am too tall.” I told her that perhaps the clothes are just too short. She sent me some unspoken eye messages.

She went off to put on her own clothes and he proceeded to tell me how awesome it was that his son from another mother was 11 and all the numbers aligned with his age and his own age and this coming baby’s age. I asked if the 11 year old was excited about the birth of a new brother or sister and he said he was used to it because his son’s mom had other kids and would have to get over sharing now with him. Then he again brought up the “awesome number” coincidence of all the family. It seemed like he wanted me to join in that celebration so I just acknowledged it. I think he was banking any foot holds to climb this new mountain. He also said that this was his partner’s first time at being pregnant, but thought that she would still be smokin’ hot even while she was pregnant and after.

Apparently it meant a lot to him to assure her of her hotness for both himself and her. In a weird way, because he wasn’t a wordsmith, he was trying his best to be loving. I am a fan of encouragement. I was also thinking that he was trying to convince everyone what he already knew, that his term of hotness will wane in his current meaning and hopefully morph into a new version of smokin’ hotness….. or not. haha

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